


Beautiful Being

by lovingcasper



Category: Original Work
Genre: Canon LGBTQ Male Character, Falling In Love, Gen, Genderfluid Character, LGBT, LGBTQ Character, LGBTQ Female Character, Love, OC, OCs - Freeform, Original Characters - Freeform, Other, Sad, Sad Ending, Trans, Trans Character, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-15
Updated: 2019-09-15
Packaged: 2020-10-19 06:03:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20652386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovingcasper/pseuds/lovingcasper
Summary: The king falls in love with his advisor, but the advisor is.....?





	Beautiful Being

The white lace of his dress compliments Charlie’s freckled skin as he dances cursively in front of the golden framed mirror. There is no music moving him. It is nothing but blood and flesh. Bare feet sliding cold against the marble floor, his face reads as nothing and everything at once. I watch him as his hazel eyes trail over his own body in awe and in sorrow. I never really tell how he could do it. How can such a man make such expressions? Sweat plastered forehead, he wipes at his golden hair. Charlie, curly haired Charlie. How he hums a tune from his rosy lips as he nears his unmade bed. When he falls asleep under the white covers, I dread to see him wake from his peaceful state and dress for the throne in the morning.

Lined with pillars on each side, the vast, golden throne room houses Charlie’s steel chair. He sits with his adviser, Mona, by his left side. Although, he adores the shallow feeling of having followers rather than friends as the king because of not having the responsibility of keeping friends, he lusts after Mona’s position. It’s much more respectable than his. One might think that Charlie’s love (if they even knew that Charlie loved her) handed her the position she’s in. They would be very wrong, for Mona Leon is an extremely skilled strategist in times of war. Charlie recognized this and promoted her to the lead role on merit alone. But then, in periods of struggle, he’d fall in even deeper into the abyss of this love. Her eyes glimmered with optimism and daring curiosity. Or was it intelligence? Maybe it was everything about her all the time that made him fall. But Charlie doesn’t need to tell me he loves Mona for me to understand. I can see it in the way he dances in the mirror, in everything he does, every move he makes. In the nights where he dances so elegantly, he imagines himself to be more than a man and more than a woman; he becomes both. He becomes two lovers in one. And how painstakingly beautiful it all is when his hands move that way and his legs kick so fantastically under those lace knots of his silk dress.

With nothing brought to his attention for the day, he returns to his bedroom and tears off those awfully heavy clothes of his. I know he hates wearing fancy black shoes and long violet robes, but he does it for his kingdom. He digs frantically in his closet for the bright dress he loves so much. When his eyes spot it, he takes it into his hands and presses the whiteness to his rosy red cheeks. I love seeing him this way. It's like seeing him as a child pressing his favorite blanket to his cheek.

With a faint knock, Mona pokes her head in and sees Charlie with a face full of silk and lace.

“Your majesty?”

Charlie doesn’t answer, for he’s frozen; an icicle alone in the summer air. I notice his entire anatomy tense up in his nakedness, as Mona approaches him with caution before placing a hand on his shoulder.

“Put your clothes on and walk with me in the garden, will you?” she asks before leaving the room and closing the door behind her. Charlie dresses quickly and hides the dress behind his purple robes. He then joins Mona in the hallway, and they make their way to the garden. Conversation is short and awkward between the two as they walk.

“King Charlie, you’re the only one I can trust these days, so I feel I need to get this off my chest.”

“Tell me what is on your mind, Mona.”

She becomes silent and doesn’t speak again until they are outside in the cold of night. Squatting down by the roses, she starts twisting branches together from the trees and picking flowers from the bushes. With anxiety nibbling on his nerves, he stands by her side, trying not to acknowledge that her underwear is visible against her porcelain skin in her current position. However, I know that his imagination is stirring.

“What are you doing?”

“Hush.”

Mona stands. Scraping off the thorns of the roses she picked, she twists them into the circle of branches and smiles at the result. She takes it and places it on Charlie’s head.

“A flower crown for my darling king.”

Her grin grows wider as her hands fall to her side. Charlie notices how she glows in the patches of moonlight on her skin. The blonde strands of hair stuck to her lip tempts him to touch her, temptation that builds and builds in his fingertips.

“Mona.”

He leans in close to her face and their lips touch for the briefest of moments before Mona retracts in shame. She says that she can’t, for he is the king, but there is someone else. I wish I could tell Charlie of everything I’ve seen in Mona’s life. I wish I could tell him of the love she shares with another. Kisses, late night dates, and the secrecy of their forbidden love.

“I’m in love, Charlie,” her eyes water as she speaks, for she holds him dear in her heart in a way he will never accept.

Charlie’s world abruptly sinks into a gray one. The rose bushes around them are dead, and the flower crown on his head starts to dig into his scalp.

“With who?”

“A woman…” And there it is. There it is. The words to shatter Charlie’s heart into a million pieces.

I’ve known of Mona and her love for women for years, and I’ve known that Charlie never had a chance with her. It’s sad to have seen him fall so deeply into the abyss of this forever unrequited love. Mona, the woman who was born to serve her kingdom and her king, was everything but a potential lover to Charlie. She holds him dear in her heart, for she has served him for many, many years and has seen all of him in beauty.

I could see Charlie’s heart drop to his toes from here. He’s holding back tears in his eyes. And how serene his sudden heartbreak is. Without warning, Charlie sprints with all his might back to his room and changes into his dress. If only Mona knew how he felt. If only Mona knew that he’s split between two people when he’s alone. That it breaks his heart every day that he can’t morph into his true form. I know he wishes he could say that sometimes he is a woman, and he could be that woman for her when she wants him to be. It’s a devastating feeling knowing that he’s stuck in the middle. He’s not quite in the separate worlds of men and women. He is alone. He will always be alone, for his fluidity will never be accepted or tolerated. He can't tell her. Even if she has told him that she's in love with a woman, he can't tell her because this is different from her. This secret he holds within himself is drastically different from what she experiences. 

Even as these feelings slowly combust in his veins, he gets the sense that he is more a man than any woman he could ever be at the moment. I wish I could love him, but I’m nothing but a thing. The most I can do is watch him from the walls, floors, and the glass chandeliers, for I am merely his castle. Never have I seen a fluid person in this age. I loathe to see this one cry with knitted eyebrows and a frown.

“Charlie, Charlie,” he whispered to himself, “You are loved.”

What a beautiful being.


End file.
